I am wondering today who I really am... do you ever have that kind of day? I felt very sensitive at work today. It was one of those days when you realize that other people are actually judging the quality of your work. This comes as no surprise, since my work is reflected in the progress of my students. I am questioning whether or not my best was good enough this semester. Maybe I should have done more of this or that with my students, or maybe I need to focus more on (fill in the blank) next semester. At some point I guess we all question whether or not the very thing that we have been laying our hands to is even making a difference. So, who are we then?
When I picked Tony up from school, one of the teachers pulled me aside and said how much she enjoyed me bringing the opera to his school. She even said that she was so impressed that I did that for a living because she thought of me as "just another Mom". That's funny. Just another Mom. You know, I actually took that as a compliment. That allowed me to remember that, though I get much satisfaction out of my job, when it comes down to it, I am "just another Mom." I waited a long time to be a Mom. I even think I wouldn't mind having that quote on a t-shirt, coffee-mug or a key-chain. Then on days that I feel less than accomplished at work, I can remember that I have a "fan club" at home. My time is not my own. I am more than the accomplishments of my students or even my own. I am not perfect, nor do I have to pretend to be. I have a son who thinks that I hung the moon and a daughter who doesn't even know that I exist, yet. That is who I am..."just another Mom."