Don't lose hope!

That seems to be a phrase that I have been repeating to myself, and to my friends in the same position, a lot lately!! This journey is taking so much longer than we had anticipated. That is frustrating and disheartening. I tend to flounder between complete trust in God's plan and feelings of weary-I don't think I can wait any longer-losing heart moments.

We turned in our initial application almost 15 months ago and still have, at least, another 4 months until baby comes home. What might soon add to that wait is that the courts close in Ethiopia for all of September and part to all of August. So, if we don't get a call by next week for the baby, then we will have to wait that extra 1-2 months to get before the courts....just waiting for them to open again. We don't actually appear in the court for the second trip, just the Embassy, so that wouldn't change anything. The first trip will be scheduled approximately 6-8 weeks after you accept your referral, though. As the month of June winds down here, it looks like we will miss the cut-off to make it to the courts before they close. If we get our call after next week, then probably we will not be making the first trip until October/ November and then the second to bring her home November/ December. Wow. That seems like a lifetime away after all of the waiting that we have already done. Confused? So am I. Especially trying to "map it all out" in my head. Which has proven o be fruitless, anyway. There are many more elaborate explanations of this new two-trip policy, but that's my rough interpretation of it.
Okay, all things in perspective. We are all having a great summer at the Smith house, with all sorts of activity and time with friends and family. We are truly blessed and will just keep-on keeping-on.

Hopefully the next post will be about our "referral call"! Hopefully...



Tony swimming in the Nolichucky- you've come a long way, baby! 6/21

#4!

We are officially #4 on the list now! Yeah! We are truly getting prepared for the next stage of this process. Well, frankly, I feel we have been prepared for the next stage for a while, but the process seems to be dragging out longer than we expected.

Adoption lesson #1. Almost EVERYTHING about adoption will take longer than what you are told. So, be prepared to wait and wait and then wait some more.

Adoption Lesson #2. Don't assume anything, because things can change at the drop of a hat. Like the travel to Ethiopia, just two months ago we were expecting only one trip there and now we have to take two.

Is it all worth it? Absolutely, and I haven't even seen a picture of my Ethiopian Princess, yet.

Is it hard? Absolutely, but have you met Tony? Need I say more?

Can anyone do it? Yes, there is nothing special about us, just God's plan. But, I hear people say all of the time that they would love to adopt, just dont think they could "do it". Like they don't have what it takes. Not true. I want to advocate for all of those Fatherless children out there. If God ever tugs on your heart, don't ignore it. What a beautiful image of the Father's love for us all.

Still....

Still waiting. I will post soon with some really deep thoughts about this whole process, but for now am tired. But thankful! It has been almost a year since I injured my knee and I am still rehabbing it. What a different summer I am going to have, though. I have a grateful heart for the small things this summer; like driving, swimming, gardening and just being outside with Tony and Chris. I am not taking those things for granted! And what wonderful weather we have been having!

I am thankful that I just celebrated 10 years of marriage to my best friend. What an amazing ten years it has been. I couldn't have imagined ten years ago where life would have taken us. I don't think that I would change a thing. For all of the potholes in the road have become wells to draw from, deeper dependence on God and a greater trust in Him. I have relinquished so much in the past ten years, but am painfully aware that I still have FAR to go in this walk with the Lord and with Chris. Chris still hasn't seemed to have caught on to the secret that I am not perfect...."shhhh, don't tell him!" But, seriously, what a treasure he is to me.

On a different note, Tony had his friend spend the night tonight and I sang them a song before bedtime (maybe a little dorky for some 8 year-olds, but Tony loves it) and his friend said "Tony, you are so lucky that your Mom is an opera singer." I just wanted to write this down, because I am sure that in 10 years Tony will forget how "lucky" he is and think that what I do really isn't that "cool". I just love the things that they say at this age! But, at 18 I am sure that he won't enjoy me showing up at his high school wearing my "Don't make me use my opera voice" T-shirt. That's what makes the idea of doing that seem so much fun, though! hahah (evil laugh)

Patience now....please!

Please all praying people pray for us! We have now been on the waiting list for 8 months and are wondering when this thing will happen. The waiting time frame when we started this was 6-8 months, but at #4 unofficially, it seems we might not be moving as quickly as we had anticipated. I am getting a little anxious. This does not fit into my plans! You see, I had the whole thing mapped out beautifully. We would be back with our little girl by mid-summer and that would give us all time to learn about each other, and plenty of time for me to "mother" before I had to go back to work in the fall. Then, Ethiopia changed their travel policies. That will add some time (not to mention the added financial burden) with having to make two trips to Ethiopia now. There are many positive things about the two trips, but ultimately, it will add time to the "coming home" end of things. And now, it seems that there just isn't as much movement on our list. So, my plans just aren't going to come to fruition.....imagine that! God kindly laughs at "our plans" I know. We must all learn to trust Him. He is faithful and will not fail us, even if His plan looks different than ours (chuckle).

But, could you please pray anyway? That God will do all things in His time, but maybe sooner than later? And no matter what He does, please pray for patience for us. This whole journey is beginning to feel very long. I wish I could answer the question that I hear almost daily; "when are you getting your baby?" I am truly ready to have a response to that, other than "I have no idea!"

And pray for all of those orphans that are left behind. My wait is nothing compared to theirs. Waiting for a home...... a family. There are some 143 million orphans in the world. Can we make a difference in one orphan's life? Yes, we all can. We can not forget the Fatherless among us and across the world. May all of our hearts be stirred to practice this "true religion".

If you can't feed a hundred people, then feed just one. Mother Teresa

#6

New Official number on the waiting list! This is our number for May. We pray that things start moving even faster, especially since I am out of school for the summer and now have many hours to sit and feel anxious about the wait! This number does not take into account the people who were in the process of getting their referral paperwork in when the numbers went out. Yes, I said paperwork; every step of the way there is more paperwork. I pray that we don't get our referral while we are out of town, because you want to get your paperwork done immediately so that you can get your travel dates ASAP. Lord, give me patience and quickly! :) But, seriously please pray for our referral to come sooner than later, so that we can get that baby home and have lots of time with her before the school year starts again.


Also, yesterday was Tony's "forever" day. We celebrate the day that he was "officially" ours; forever. We had a picnic and cupcakes, and Tony swam in the lake by himself. That was quite an accomplishment for him. He has come so far! I am so excited about the growth that he has made. I am so thankful that God has given us the same opportunity. The chance to be His forever, with unconditional Love that we can never be separated from. How wide and deep is His love for us all. I pray that we can all love our children the way that the Father loves us, and those days that we fall short, we can accept God's mercy and start afresh.

I thought that I would put up some statistics about the country of Ethiopia, since people have asked why we chose that particular country to adopt from. These facts had an influence in our decision; go where the need is greatest. The following statistics give you a brief overview of the need there.

There is an estimated 4 million orphans in Ethiopia......

 1 in 10 children die before their first birthday
 1 in 6 children die before age 5
 Over 50% of children are stunted
 Malnutrition is the underlying cause of more than half of all child deaths
 Although accurate statistics are hard to come by, it is estimated that approximately 4.4% of the population in Ethiopia is infected with AIDS (CIA World Factbook) and that there are approximately 1 million AIDS orphans
 Only 50% of children attend primary school (K-3)
 Average class size in government schools – 85-100 children
 Overall literacy rate is 42%, with many more girls and women illiterate than men
 Unlawful kidnapping and forced seizure of young girls for marriage is common in certain parts of Ethiopia, especially in the SNNPR (13%) and Oromia (11% )
 1 in 4 women dies in childbirth or from a pregnancy-related illness

Who am I?

I am wondering today who I really am... do you ever have that kind of day? I felt very sensitive at work today. It was one of those days when you realize that other people are actually judging the quality of your work. This comes as no surprise, since my work is reflected in the progress of my students. I am questioning whether or not my best was good enough this semester. Maybe I should have done more of this or that with my students, or maybe I need to focus more on (fill in the blank) next semester. At some point I guess we all question whether or not the very thing that we have been laying our hands to is even making a difference. So, who are we then?

When I picked Tony up from school, one of the teachers pulled me aside and said how much she enjoyed me bringing the opera to his school. She even said that she was so impressed that I did that for a living because she thought of me as "just another Mom". That's funny. Just another Mom. You know, I actually took that as a compliment. That allowed me to remember that, though I get much satisfaction out of my job, when it comes down to it, I am "just another Mom." I waited a long time to be a Mom. I even think I wouldn't mind having that quote on a t-shirt, coffee-mug or a key-chain. Then on days that I feel less than accomplished at work, I can remember that I have a "fan club" at home. My time is not my own. I am more than the accomplishments of my students or even my own. I am not perfect, nor do I have to pretend to be. I have a son who thinks that I hung the moon and a daughter who doesn't even know that I exist, yet. That is who I am..."just another Mom."

Typhoid Vaccination Hurts!

Okay, so today Chris and I got vaccinated for Typhoid. The nurse said that it won't make your arm hurt like a tetanus shot....yeah, it wasn't anything like that....it was ten times worse. I couldn't even lift my arm up to play the piano for my students today. Very painful! Anyway, just thought I would share that fact.

There doesn't seem to have been much motion these last two weeks with the referral portion of the list, so we are still waiting, and waiting, and waiting.....